Last night, when I closed my eyes to sleep, I experienced a deep black space. This space was in the absence of any thoughts, images or words. I experienced a similar darkness in my room when I opened my eyes. Then why am I afraid of the dark outside and not the darkness I find myself most comfortable with? (sleep)
When I close my eyes and when I try to look how I really am, it brings discomfort. Looking at my actions brings me to an unsettling position. Why? Because, this moment what I am looking at is the crude self. Unpolished with words and gestures, not decorated with emotions and reactions. If I gather strength to look at myself just as I am, no amount of fear would crowd me. This self is deep, it is dark, no bling. This is the darkness I speak of. This darkness is in no way equivalent to any negativity. This is simply a space. An absence in no need to be filled with. Somehow, human conditioning fills it with actions, reactions, emotions, and the thought of "I".
Maybe, this is why we travel to places far off. We witness a world that is unknown to us. We witness new cultures, new language, new people. Why? This new unexplored realm makes us realise we are not the only one. We are surrounded by so much we are unaware of.
This morning when I looked up at the sky, I found birds, blue sky, airplanes and thick white clouds. Beautiful. But how wonderful is it that we are surrounded by this thick atmospheric layer which beautifully blindfolds the universe beyond.
Seeing is believing, but why do we think that our eyes are the only medium to see? Only the person who has never dreamt or imagined would say that.
Eyes are a camera, only a medium to capture the moment and nothing more.
You take your phone out in night, deep dark, and click a picture, do you see the same image in your phone as you are seeing with your eyes? Why? Because your phone captures an image which it is most capable of. Our eyes only show us facts and images that it is most capable of. But the deep dark universe that is free from knowledge and understanding within us shows us things that our eyes would never be able to.
I am not afraid of dark.